it's me, scott. i'm straight.

last night, i came home from work, and i didn't have the usual "runrunrun meow!" greeting at my door. i looked at my sliding-glass door, and the screen was open. "crap," i thought.

so i went outside, and said "riiisa!" (that is kitty's name, see?) and she ran over from the office and meowed at me. and i was talking to the people who work in the apartment office, and they said that she had been sitting outside of their window all day just watching them. cute, but still a bad kitty!

i clipped her nails to get back at her. she hates that! haha. but she needs it done every once in a while.

there is an ad banner flashing right above where i am writing this, saying i can win $1000 for a poem! i will write a poem right now:

liza q potter
is making me write this crap
she is kind of fat.

it's a haiku! please send me $1000 now. thank you.

my new friend marie (who wrestles and carries water jugs for a living) told me this funny joke yesterday! ready? here goes:

q: what has two legs and bleeds a lot?
a: half a cat!

haha! okay. it's kind of sick. but, see, it's funny! and i told it to ed, and he said "that would be a lot funnier if it was "half an elephant." becuase apparently elephants are funnier than cats? and then while ed and i were discussing elephants, megan came over and started talking about how she heard elephants earlier out in the parking lot. she is kind of crazy.

last night, i drank a vanilla coke. mmmm! i love vanilla, but i hatehatehate the smell of it. like, remember ten years ago when people wore that "vanilla fields" perfume? that stuff was sick. i had a crush on a girl named sarah hodges who wore that stuff, and even though i had a crush on her, i never wanted to be around her when she reeked of that crap! yuck.

please don't hate me for telling that cat joke. i love kitties! and little yellow dogs! and maybe even you!

love,
scott.

ps - liza loves me!! look!