one day (it was a tuesday), alexander came home from work, sat down on his couch, popped open a can of motor oil, and flipped on the evening news on his television.

"danger! danger!" warned the tv newscaster, "robots are trying to take over the earth!"

alexander glanced at his watch.

he then glanced back at the television.

"run for your lives!" screamed the newscaster

alexander walked outside to take a look. sure enough, everywhere he looked, humans were shooting laser guns at robots, and robots were running around pickig up humans and eating them.

"this is very strange," thought alexander. "why didn't my friends tell me we were taking over the world today? why didn't the guys at work mention it?"

as alexander stood watching, a large fishing net fell over his head. a giant red robot grabbed the net, and began hauling me away.

"ack!" yelled alexander.

the giant red robot ripped the net off of alexander, picked him up, and began eating him.

"eek!" yelled alexander, "why are you eating me! i will help you take over the world, i promise! it's just, my friends didn't tell me that we were doing this tonight!"

"beep," said the giant red robot, "beep beep. me eat."

as the giant red robot continued to eat alexander, he caught a glimpse of himself in the reflection of the robot's shiny metal teeth. he saw flesh, and he saw hair.

"oh my god!" thought alexander, "i'm a human! i've been wasting my life in a ketchup packet factory! i've been drinking motor oil! i've been running around saying 'beep' for no reason at all!"

this was the last thought alexander ever had, as the giant red robot devoured him, and thus was the end of alexander.

(the end.)

and the moral of the story is:

avoid cough syrup that tastes like beef jerky, sweetie.